Faith, Trust, and the Addict
What is faith? What is trust? As a recovering addict, both will have a huge impact on your restoration, particularly when it comes to your friends and family. Understanding both ideas as well as the role they play in your personal recovery will enable you to see how your family can learn to trust again.
Faith is the one thing, the only thing God requires of us. It is our absolute belief in Him as the Creator and Savior of our lives even when we may not have physical proof of His existence. It holds divine meaning for us and as humans; it is based on trust. But, trust is a human emotion, a human value. Trust is something you earn, something you are willing to do. As you have learned through creating a relationship with Him, a small amount of willingness allows you to trust God. God takes that trust and brings it to life in your heart; as you feel that change, you are willing to trust more and over time your faith in Him blossoms and grows. You believe in Him and even though you may not see Him, you trust He will be there with you every step of the way in your recovery.
Addiction Erodes Trust; Faith Restores Trust
Your addiction has eroded the trust in your family has in you. An important part of your healing focuses on your understanding of that. While you have changed, and your family may recognize that, they cannot simply forget the pain of broken promises and trust. It is something you will have to earn back from them. A steady reliance on your faith will help you build back the trust your family once had in you. There is no magic or way to speed this up. Think of how long it took when you were in the thick of your addiction to violate their trust. Understanding what it will take to re-earn it is what you must focus on now.
Your faith, which was built from a willingness to trust, will be the same faith that will guide you through a restoration of trust from your family. This will not be an easy process and it will require patience and understanding during a time you may not feel you have a lot to give. You must remember that it was the selfishness and self-centeredness of your dependency that caused their lack of trust in the first place. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to earning back trust. What works for one family member may not be the same for another. Some may be quick to trust again while others may take quite a bit of time. Your responsibility through all of it is to prove you are trustworthy. Spend time to show them the person you have become.
Most importantly, rely on your faith and trust in God to stay sober. Pray for His strength when you find yourself in situations you realize you cannot control. And while you are praying, don’t get frustrated. Each day do a little more to earn their trust back. Through your actions and prayers, they will see the progress you are making. Showing frustration serves two purposes: it shows others that you don’t have the faith you are in this for the long haul and it shows God that you do not believe He has the right plan for you. And He does; He always does – even when you don’t believe He does.
Recovery from addiction is great, but God is greater. It is with Him you will stay strong. It is because of Him you will forever break the chains binding you to your addiction. And, it is through Him you will be able to work slowly to earn your family and friends’ trust back.
God is faithful