How Could God Forgive Me For Turning My Back On Him In My Addiction?

Guilt, remorse, regret, fear, despair. As we start to come out of the alcoholic fog, these are the states many of us will pass through. Though we are following the steps and relying upon God, we are plagued by the sins and wrongs we committed in addiction. And many times it was the nagging memories of these wrongs that continued to drive us deeper into addiction.

We could not look at the reality of who we had become and what we had done. We drank or used to drown the sound of our conscience.

Trying To Be Christian And An Addict

Some of us attempted to live through the dissonance of trying to be a Christian and simultaneously being an addict. We continued to give lip service to God, we showed up at church and maybe we even continued in ministry positions. But behind the scenes we were worshiping at the altar of an addictive substance or behavior. We prayed for release and we prayed for healing, but we continued to use.

Others saw that there was really no honest way to live as a follower of God and as an addict. So we consciously chose the addiction, thereby turning our backs on God, His Word and His plan for our lives. We suspected it wasn’t necessarily a wise decision, but we could think of no other way to cope with a life that had become so unmanageable.

In Recovery Wondering If Can God Really Forgive Us For Turning Our Backs On Him In Addiction

Forgiveness-God Forgive Me In My Addiction-wwwChristiandrugrehab.comBut we’re sober now and things look a little different. We’re in recovery and we are learning of God’s love and grace for addicts. We are told it is God who is keeping us sober and helping us to recover, one day at a time. But even though we are seeing evidence of this, we can’t help wondering, can God really forgive us for turning our backs on Him in addiction? Will He really help us stay sober after our years of defiance?

When we look at ourselves, what we have done and the people we have been, guilt, regret and shame are the natural responses. We know how God wants us to live and we know how we have failed that vision. The program tells us to be brutally honest about ourselves and the people we have been, detailing every resentment, fault and wrongdoing. We feel overwhelmed.

Confession, Repentance And Turning Toward God

But we don’t stay there. The fourth step calls for this honesty, but it does not leave us to wallow in the past. While we must be self-reflective and honest about who we are and what we have done, we cannot allow our gaze to stay on ourselves. We are humans, we are sinners and we have made mistakes—some of them quite grave. But this is not the end of the story.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

From the fourth step, we are taken into the fifth step, which is, in a way, a confession. Before God and another human being, we confess to the wrongs we have committed, especially our former desire to turn away from God and to live by our own self will.

We turn our eyes away from ourselves and toward God. God is holy and perfect, but He is also patient, loving and abounding in grace. We are His children, His beloved creation and He knows us. He knows that we stray, and like a shepherd, He is patiently waiting to bring us back into the fold.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. John 3:16-17

God Can Forgive Us Through The Sacrifice Of Jesus Christ

It is through Jesus Christ that God can forgive us for our wanderings and our defiance. God did not want to see us perish in sin, so He sent Christ to be the sacrifice for our sins—no matter how severe. Anyone who will accept this gift of grace can know the peace of forgiveness and the abundance of God’s grace. Even addicts.

If you fear that God cannot forgive you for turning your back on Him, confess your sin and repent. Pray that God would lead you on a new path. The Good Shepherd wants to bring you back into the flock—don’t resist. Accept His love and grace, and live in freedom.

Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered. Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity, and in whose spirit there is no deceit. For when I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer.

I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and you forgave the iniquity of my sin … Psalm 32:1-11

Have Hope…For The Lord Has Hope In You!